Sonya Singh, SARI, NOT SARI
[0:01]Hi, this is Ziggy Owens, and you're listening to the award-winning podcast,
[0:05]Momstone Have Time to Read Books.
[0:07]And speaking of books, I have two of my own books coming out this spring and summer.
[0:12]Princess Charming is a picture book which debuts on April 19th,
[0:16]and bookends, a memoir of love, loss, and literature.
[0:20]Comes out on July 1st, and it is truly a labor of love.
[0:24]I hope you'll pre-order, order, and join me on tour as I go across the country.
[0:28]You can find out more at zibbyowens.com or bookendsmemoir.com,
[0:34]and you can follow me on Instagram at zibbyowens because I always post about everything.
[0:38]Enjoy the show!
[0:41]Hey everyone, I need your help. If you love this podcast, you will love my children's book.
[0:46]It's called Princess Charming, and I am really trying to drum up pre-order sales.
[0:51]You might not know this, but before a book comes out, it's actually a really important time
[0:55]for the whole book's trajectory. So please pre-order Princess Charming, which comes out April 19th
[1:02]today. Just stop what you're doing and go do that, please. When it arrives at April 19th,
[1:07]you can give it to a loved one in your life, a niece, a grandchild, a child, a student,
[1:14]a kid walking by on the street, anybody. But if you could do this, here is my offer.
[1:20]If you email me your receipt showing me that you bought the book online somewhere and pre-ordered it,
[1:26]email info at zibbyowens.com. That's info at zibbyowens.com, and I will pick 10 people to do a special
[1:35]giveaway project award to from my new Bonfire merch store, which you should also check out,
[1:42]which is the Zibbyowens Media Bonfire store, where you can get all sorts of cool t-shirts and
[1:48]tote bags and author sayings and all sorts of great stuff. Or dice a 10 of you are going to get
[1:54]a special care package of your choice from the Bonfire store. And I will pick at random from
[2:00]all of you who pre-ordered the book. So if that wasn't clear, go pre-order Princess Charming. Again,
[2:06]it's called Princess Charming. It's my debut picture book. It's really cute and great and it's
[2:12]illustrated by Holly Hadam. And then after you get the receipt, screenshot it or afford it to me
[2:18]at info at zibbyowens.com. And you will be entered to win one of 10 exciting care packages. So go
[2:27]off in order. Thank you so much. Bye. I had a great time doing an Instagram live with Sonia
[2:33]saying on her pub day for sorry, not sorry spelled S-A-R-I. So sorry, not sorry, where she revealed
[2:41]this news, which you are about to hear, but it was revealed on Instagram Live. So if you want to
[2:46]also watch her and me speak, you can, I guess, do so simultaneously on my Instagram at Zibbyowens.
[2:53]Okay, here's her bio. Sonia Singh is an author, writer, and storyteller who currently lives
[2:59]in Toronto, Canada. She's a former entertainment reporter turned PR expert. Sonia wrote her debut
[3:04]novel, sorry, not sorry, to laugh her way through some of her most disastrous breakups.
[3:10]In her spare time, you can find Sonia sipping on a much-alad day enjoying a homemade pizza
[3:15]or hanging out with her adorable dog, Moses Alexander. Hi. Hi, okay. Congratulations to you.
[3:23]I just, I heard this like long grocery list of all the amazing accomplishments that you just
[3:28]received today. Amazing. Congratulations. Thank you. I was so excited. I couldn't believe it.
[3:33]I was just hoping for like one. I was like, I would love to get just one, not whoever
[3:37]in this year, but yeah, there were four horses. Yeah, I know. That's great. Well, I think April 5th
[3:42]is just a lucky day for everybody. Have you find a day for you? Well, you know, it's my pub day.
[3:50]It's been so exciting. I'm just, you know, I'm, it's so funny because my, my thumbs are actually
[3:54]numb just from social media. And I don't want to over post, but then I'm also thinking this
[4:00]is the only time like you just went through all your accolades. It's actually a great time just to
[4:04]cheerleader and champion yourself. And I want to do that with, I shouldn't feel bad for it.
[4:08]No, don't feel bad. What else do you want to share? Tell me about you. I'm here for it. I'm here for
[4:13]it. I'm here for it. Sorry, not sorry, which is fabulous. And it reads like I'm watching a
[4:20]sitcom or something. I mean, is this already going to be a movie or a show or something?
[4:24]Does it? I can't, I can't talk about that stuff, but we'll get to the movie stuff after. But
[4:30]that's so funny. You said that because I actually wrote it like a sitcom. And I was thinking
[4:36]that when it was playing out in the actual book that I wanted to see it on this small screen.
[4:42]And I really wanted it to be something that South Asian women could go and see characters like
[4:48]themselves versus Bridget Jones, you know, sex of the city where everybody at the time was very
[4:54]Caucasian. And I'm like, oh, it's time to actually have something on TV or in the movies that
[4:59]looks like me. I love it. Or not particularly like you as it happened on the cover of the magazine
[5:06]in the book. Right. Yeah. Yeah. You know, and that's actually a funny story because well, it's not
[5:11]funny. But I got that headline, so to speak, because I had seen a picture of Jennifer Aniston.
[5:18]And she was on the front cover of, I want to say it was like in style or one of those big magazines.
[5:23]And they had changed her look so that she looks significantly darker. And there was a lot of
[5:29]uproar about that. So I kind of switched the story around. And some of that story was also,
[5:36]I made myself look really white growing up, you know, I had the blue and gray contacts and
[5:42]the bleach blonde hair and did you really? Yeah, it was awful. What you're not going to pull up
[5:47]one of those blooper reels, are you? But it was so bad. And I just want to like give that little girl
[5:55]a hug because she was so embarrassed to be Indian. And now I'm just like get out of my way
[6:01]because I'm a South Asian. I'm so proud of it. And this is my hair. And these are my eyes and
[6:06]my looks. And that's all you're going to get. Wow. Where do you feel like when did it, when did it change?
[6:11]Wait, let's go back to this for one second for people who want to know what you're bad. Can
[6:15]you do a little synopsis? Yeah, of course. I'd love to. So sorry, not sorry. I actually
[6:21]loved the way how you said, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. It's so Indian of you.
[6:26]I love it. It rolls off your tongue. So it's about this strong South Asian woman
[6:31]who owns a breakup agency. And I really wanted her to own something or run something that was
[6:37]very non-traditional. So of course, it asked to be a breakup agency. And she's in the midst
[6:43]of being at the top of her game in terms of her career. And she's getting a lot of questions
[6:47]about her culture and her heritage. And she doesn't have the answers. And she really wants those
[6:52]answers. So she looks around in her inner circle. And nobody's really Indian or nobody's really
[6:57]around to give her what she is missing out on. And then all of a sudden, a client comes along,
[7:02]Sammy Patel, who is looking for a temporary breakup. But breakup, the agency doesn't do
[7:08]second chances. There's no pauses like a Ross and Rachel, you know, once you, once you break up,
[7:13]you break up. And so they decide to get together to be able to help each other out. And then
[7:19]Manny goes away with Sammy for his brother's wedding for a week. And she gets a crash course.
[7:24]And his point of view of what it takes to be Indian, at least like on a very superficial level,
[7:30]you know, this is fun. This is I'm trying to put this in a way, which is its fiction. It's not
[7:35]faction, right? So you're going to get a lot of humor in it. You're going to get a lot of point
[7:39]of view of weddings and how it's like to dress up and eat and the aunties and uncles. That's what
[7:45]the book to me is about. Wow, I love it. This whole idea, by the way, of the breakup agency and how
[7:50]it's the beginning of every chapter, you have one of these funny breakup tags. Wait, hold on,
[7:54]I dug your one of them to read up your breakup. My boyfriend is constantly reminding me of how
[7:59]heavy I am. As I have invested in a digestion and trainer for myself, not him. The other day,
[8:05]he hit an all time low this week and has started to put sticking notes on food in the fridge. And
[8:10]he thinks I shouldn't be eating. Don't eat me, chubs. Talk about a motivation not to lose weight.
[8:15]I want to break up with him. Eat my relationship with food while I drop the 170 pounds of dead weight
[8:20]that's been hanging around. I'm ready to lose it, lady. Oh my god, I love it. And that's actually
[8:26]a true story. So I have to tell you that I dated a guy many years ago and he nicknamed me Christmas
[8:34]ham. That's what he, yes, that's what he would refer to me as this was, you know, it doesn't
[8:39]matter what time it was, but it's still still so inappropriate. And because I had gained some weight,
[8:44]and that was his way of pushing me to lose weight was to remind me that I was, you know,
[8:50]chunky or meaty like a Christmas ham. I know. I mean, public service notion, that type of
[8:56]motivation does not work. It does not work. You know, like, I want to be a cedar right about it later,
[9:01]if anything. Yeah, exactly. More fun. Everything is coffee, right? Exactly. Exactly.
[9:07]My favorite character in this book was the guy selling the coffee, like on the coffee card.
[9:11]Oh, what's this? Oh, my gosh. So it's funny because one of my ex-boyfriends is an actor. And
[9:18]I actually modeled him after him. So Regina modeled after him, although, you know, I've kind of
[9:25]played with him playing the character if it was to turn into a movie. And he's like, no, I would
[9:28]want to play that character. And Regina's man, he's like, best friend. You know, Regina's there
[9:33]for all of it. And he's just, he's so innocent. You know, he has like the funniest puns. And he's just
[9:39]so he's got a lot of humor to him. And it's just one of those things that he says. And you don't
[9:43]even know that it's going to be funny. But he's just so cute. You know, he just want to hug him.
[9:47]I love how you had him in like the final scene, like how being so, you know, I don't want to give
[9:52]anything away. But like how he was there towards the end. And just like hearing everybody on. And just
[9:57]like, you know, I told you so. And I'll eat it.
[10:00]Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. Yeah. We won't say what happens. Yeah, but he you're right. It was a total told you so moments for me and he'd been pushing that all along. So it was really nice to see that. I think that was one of the things that I loved about this book for myself is all those friendships are actually friendships that I have in real life and have had.
[10:21]And through like my own grief and my own loss, which Manny went through a lot of those people, they're not just characters that I imagine sound a certain way or place your typical rules. No, there are individuals in my life, whether it's family or best friends or, you know, ex-boyfriends or girlfriends, but they're definitely a big part of how I am today and how I've reacted to situations in the last couple of years.
[10:48]Well, you wrote really beautifully about Manny's parents dying. And I think I've got your some of those pages as well. There was some section that, you know, although I did talk here that research tells you that it's better to break up on a Thursday. So for that away, anybody who needs that kind of data.
[11:04]So why is that? Why is that? Yeah, exactly. So you can like hide out on a Friday and I don't feel bad for yourself with a large bottle of wine and some M&M's and yeah, exactly.
[11:16]Okay, well now first I can't find the passage to that was going to read. But anyway, but basically you talk about the loss and how it's hard to just regroup and join in life and how sometimes even moments later, a little thing can like bring it all back a comment or something.
[11:35]I didn't realize they come from a place of loss for you personally. What can you do? But what's happened or? Yeah, I mean, and I think you know this having talked openly about your own grief. I mean, I went through back to back personal losses outside of going through just to break up.
[11:52]This is like a very difficult loss for me to family members that, you know, I loved and adored passed away. And so I think for me, you know, it's not that's not many story that is there's chunks of obviously experiences that I've gone through, but it just happened to be a character that has lost her parents, but certainly was not reflective of how I went through that situation.
[12:14]My parents were constantly pushing Indian culture laughter. They were always like, you know, do do something with us when it comes to Diwali, but in a very modernized way they wanted to make sure that we assimilated really well and got the best of both worlds.
[12:29]I also even just love many being this like badass. See how I mean entrepreneur CEO like running the business and I know she partners with Adam and he helps her take it to the next level and everything and they have their own interesting relationship as it develops and it's always good to have somebody reading for your success and helping, you know, pull you along.
[12:48]But that element was fabulous too. And I know you're this former reporter and all your career stuff yourself. So tell me about even just making many into this awesome female leader.
[13:00]Yeah. Oh my gosh. Thank you so much. You know, I wanted her to be this amazing leader. Like I said in a non traditional role. I really wanted her to kick butt inside of something that was not a lawyer, not a doctor, not an engineer, which, you know, we're typical.
[13:15]Education places that we went to as women or careers that we went to as women, particularly if you're self Asian. You were pushed in that direction. And so I wanted her to kick butt and something else and I was lucky enough to be an entertainment reporter. I went from Canada to LA and I wanted her to have those experiences.
[13:34]And so I wanted to talk about her even being in front of the camera. She's channeling a lot of what I went through and Hollywood as well too. But I really wanted her to be badass. You know, I wanted her to walk in with the Calvin
[13:47]That agency and also just to have other South Asian women who read this book and think, I can be that I don't need to take a path which makes my parents happy or the Indian community happy.
[14:00]I can actually do whatever I want to, whether it's a makeup artist, it's a fashion designer. South Asians are kicking butt right now.
[14:07]You know, it's this is what I wanted the book to represent.
[14:12]How long did it take to write the book?
[14:14]So it took me, you know, because I had gone through that period of grief. It took me four months because I dived right into it and I wrote as much as I could and I literally remember writing 30,000 words in four days and those words are probably crap. But it just just came out of me so quickly. And then the process of editing took probably about another six months.
[14:37]And then everything happened so quickly. But which I'm so happy about. But you know, at the same time I was getting a lot of rejections from agents who are telling me that my story was too South Asian, not South Asian enough or that they couldn't have another South Asian author debuting at the same time because there was already one coming out.
[14:57]I was so baffled by the industry. I didn't understand why there wasn't room for me. So the process really was getting myself in a place where I didn't feel competitive with other South Asian women because I think that's what the industry was leveling me off to do in the beginning to feel that any other author that was South Asian that I needed to compete against.
[15:19]I finally got to a place where I appreciate all of us. Like a South Asian author who just wrote the surface train sent me a bouquet of flowers. I've never met her slid into my DMs. You know, can't wait to see her tonight is the launch party. And that's what I really want for other South Asian women in any of these creative fields.
[15:36]Amazing. Oh my gosh. And what a role model you'll be then also for kids now. And no, it's great. I mean, thank you. It's really wonderful.
[15:46]Okay. So after writing this, it's just basically like, we were out of you. What else are you like, are you hunched to write more and have you already written more?
[15:54]The fake matchmaker is the second book that's coming out. So it'll be based on Manisha who's like a pivotal character in the book. And she's just, she needs her own book anyway. She's just so fun and so lighthearted and she carried the story.
[16:07]You know, drum roll on the breaking news.
[16:10]I was like, is that a joke that it's breaking news because it's just coming out or like do you actually have news?
[16:16]No, so like actually actually the, I'm going to write the first hallmark movie, the first holiday hallmark movie that is South Asian. So there's going to be a Christmas holiday hallmark movie. Say all that one breath. And it comes out December 2022.
[16:32]I've started writing it. Hallmark gave me this amazing opportunity to team up with them and crown media. And there'll be four leading South Asians in a movie that we're all going to watch next year.
[16:43]Oh my gosh.
[16:46]So excited. That is awesome. Congratulations. Oh, thank you. I wanted to share that news with you. And you know, I've been such a big fan of yours. I know you've also gone through your trials and tribulations have been so open about everything that's happened in your life.
[16:59]So I just felt a really good connection. And I thought this would be a great way to break me as if you break brag with you and really be able to share this special moment.
[17:07]Oh, I love that. And I'm so excited for you. I can't wait to watch it. Anything I can do to help when it comes out. That's just.
[17:14]And you must feel so great.
[17:17]Great. You should have the day ever and just like, you know, buy a lottery ticket or something. You know, like you're on fire. Everything is great.
[17:25]It's just so exciting. So, thank you. Thank you. No, I need to like actually eat something. I haven't eaten anything all day. I need to digest the launch party is tonight and actually get to see people at a party is going to be so huge.
[17:40]I haven't seen a lot of my friends. Oh, gosh, in like two years. So we'll all get to celebrate tonight. And it's going to be fun. There's so many surprises today. I'm about a huge South Asian theme for the evenings event. So I'm really, really excited.
[17:53]And I'm excited to see who gets to read. Sorry, not sorry. I really hope it's going to be a very diverse audience. And it's not just South Asian women. Everybody reads it.
[18:04]It's great. It's really, really awesome. Well, it's, it's a, it goes fast. It's entertaining. You want to keep turning the pages. The characters are really likable or not.
[18:16]That's to be totally rooting for many the whole time and wanting to see how it all ended. And it was just really, really enjoyable. It's clever, smart, enjoyable.
[18:29]Oh, my gosh, thank you. It's so funny that you're saying that because I love hearing what you're saying. I did one of those things that you're not supposed to do as an author but check out your reviews.
[18:38]And I did this one night and I have to tell you, people were super offended that I actually started a breakup agency.
[18:46]You know, they were couldn't handle the fact that I had come up with an idea where people were going to be broken up or dumped through email and text and they were just so upset they couldn't finish the book and, you know, how thoughtless of me.
[18:59]Yeah, so, and here I am thinking that I'm giving people closure. That was part of, you know, this agency is for people to have coached their way through a breakup, but yeah, I think it's people who may be just weren't dumped the right way.
[19:13]They might just be upset.
[19:16]Well, you know, it's going to hate. You got to just ignore those reviews and focus on all the positives.
[19:22]And totally. Just enjoy it. All your hard work.
[19:25]So thank you. Thank you.
[19:27]Thank you for sharing your amazing homework, South Asian theme movie doesn't have a name yet.
[19:31]It's called Christmas spice. Christmas.
[19:34]Yeah.
[19:35]Oh, my gosh. So cool. All right.
[19:38]Thank you for joining me today. Congratulations.
[19:41]Thanks, Abby. Thank you so much. Have a great day.
[19:44]Bye, everyone.
[19:46]Thank you.
[19:48]Thanks for listening to this episode of Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books.
[19:51]Don't forget to follow me on Instagram at zebi Owens and at Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books.
[19:56]Also sign up for my newsletter at zebiowens.com and sign up for my birthday.
[20:00]to a book club and meet lots of authors on Zoom every other week.
[20:03]Thanks so much to Steve and Ryan,
[20:04]in fact, Texture Sound for the Sound Editing.
[20:07]And thank you to Morning Moon Productions
[20:08]for providing this fantastic intro and out trim music.