Kristen Glosserman, IF IT'S NOT RIGHT, GO LEFT: Practical and Inspirational Lessons to Move You in a Positive Direction
[0:01]Hi, this is Ziggy Owens, and you're listening to the award-winning podcast.
[0:05]Moms don't have time to read books, and speaking of books, I have two of my own books
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[0:35]at zibbyowens because I always post about everything.
[0:38]Enjoy the show!
[0:41]Kristen Glaserman is the author of, If It's Not Right, Go Left, Practical and Inspirational
[0:47]Lessons to Move You in a Positive Direction.
[0:50]Kristen is a life coach and has guided countless successful individuals to maximize
[0:54]their strengths and capabilities for more than a decade.
[0:57]Our clients include executives from Wall Street, Ralph Lauren, American Express, Douglas
[1:02]Element, and Sex Fifth Avenue.
[1:04]These best-in-glass business leaders seek Glaserman's advice for practical and straightforward
[1:08]strategies that work, and can be applied to all facets of their life.
[1:12]With her signature blend of contagious dynamism and genuine warmth, she is dedicated
[1:17]to helping people embrace possibility, create positive change in their personal lives and
[1:21]careers, and achieve their best version through goal setting and personal accountability.
[1:26]Glaserman is also a certified parent educator where she helps parents obtain the education
[1:30]skills that are key to raising resilient and independent children.
[1:36]Glaserman is also co-owner of Hill Country Barbecue Market with her husband, Mark.
[1:41]Welcome, Kristen.
[1:42]Thank you so much for coming in, Mom.
[1:44]Don't have time to read books to discuss if it's not right, Go Left, Practical and
[1:49]Inspirational Lessons to Move You in a Positive Direction.
[1:52]Thank you.
[1:53]Thank you.
[1:54]Thank you for having me.
[1:55]Good to light.
[1:56]I'm sorry, this has taken so long to schedule and do, but everything happens for
[2:00]a reason.
[2:01]So maybe we were meant to talk today, and your book is so great, and I love the pictures,
[2:05]but mostly I love the content, particularly the little boxes where you share your own
[2:09]personal story.
[2:10]It's like, I want more of that.
[2:12]Thank you.
[2:13]Thank you.
[2:14]So why don't you tell listeners about your book and how it came to be?
[2:19]Thank you again.
[2:20]So my book, if it's not right, Go Left, is a manual for anyone looking to move their
[2:25]life in a positive direction.
[2:28]And I share all throughout the book that if you spoke to me 18 years ago, around my 30th
[2:36]birthday, you would have met someone who was depressed and getting divorced, lacked career
[2:42]direction and was being quite destructive.
[2:45]And I made a decision that I was going to change my ways.
[2:51]And that started one decision at a time, and here I am, 48, and married, have a career
[3:00]I love and for beautiful children.
[3:03]And I wanted to share the help and the hope with anyone who wanted to hear it.
[3:10]So that was really the inspiration for the book.
[3:13]Amazing.
[3:14]One through line of your story, which is so tragic, is the loss of your brother when you
[3:19]are just 13.
[3:20]And I actually was reading some of this out loud to my kids.
[3:23]And my son was like, well, if she was 13, how old was her brother?
[3:27]So can I ask how old your brother was at the time?
[3:30]Yes, he was four years younger than me.
[3:33]So he was in grade school.
[3:35]And as you know, and I've connected with your moms, don't have time to grieve.
[3:40]When you go through something like that, it changes you forever.
[3:45]And I feel it used to be a club that was relatively small.
[3:49]And unfortunately, that club seems to be a whole lot bigger now.
[3:54]And so many of us are now having to manage holding that grief while living our lives.
[4:02]And I say, and I share that for a very long time, I struggled with that until it became
[4:09]an inspiration.
[4:10]And now so much of what I do is inspired by my brother, Michael, and his life.
[4:18]Well, I appreciate you sharing.
[4:21]It's not always easy, as you know.
[4:24]But I love how you used it to show the family that showed up for you at the time, that
[4:28]who you're still friends with your friend, Jen, and how her mom was such a rock for you.
[4:33]And how sometimes what you need just shows up for you at those times and end up being
[4:38]maybe not the people necessarily, you thought, or maybe it is.
[4:41]But the people who get you through those times, there's something where that links you
[4:45]forever and not to push those connections away, because that's those family bonds and your
[4:51]whole emphasis on nuclear family, which pervades the entire narrative with you as a mom and
[4:55]your kids and your family and everything.
[4:57]Growing up with your Catholic family and all of your traditions and the emphasis on family
[5:01]traditions, I love it.
[5:03]There's actually in my daughter's school right now, every Friday they have a parent come
[5:08]zoomed to the class about their family tradition.
[5:10]So I finally got to go last week.
[5:12]I know after all year, all year, my daughter was like, when are we going to talk, when
[5:16]is your turn for family traditions?
[5:18]What are we going to do?
[5:19]So we talked about celebrating Shabbat and I gave out Hollis to all the kids and everything.
[5:23]But yes, I totally love that part too, like the role of family and the role of support
[5:28]and all of that.
[5:29]So tell me a little bit about that and some of the ways that you've found the power of
[5:35]family, your own or your friends or your adopted or whatever.
[5:39]And I think family can be that large as you share.
[5:42]Some of us have it under one roof, but some of us have this extended family and the families
[5:47]that we choose through friendship and work and our communities.
[5:50]And those are all pillars of our life.
[5:53]So I say, you know, four kids, I mean, you know, four kids, how do you have four kids?
[6:00]I truly believe that it was the four of them that really filled that space, that whole
[6:05]and my heart after losing my brother.
[6:08]And I draw so much inspiration from, you know, my friends and their families and Jen,
[6:14]my high school friend.
[6:15]She had her mom and she had her sisters always around.
[6:19]And I remember just days after losing my brother looking around that table at the laughter
[6:25]and the bomb that they shared.
[6:27]And they had also been through so much tragedy.
[6:30]Jen had lost her cousin and then she lost her dad.
[6:33]So this was not a family that was, you know, let the good times roll.
[6:37]This was a family that had been through a lot of tragedy and they were happy.
[6:42]They were together.
[6:43]They were there for each other.
[6:45]And I knew at a very young age that having that table was going to help.
[6:50]So I think, you know, to bring it back to the book, there are things that we can do
[6:55]in our lives that can move us in a positive direction.
[6:59]And it's about knowing what they are and then creating a discipline to actually do
[7:04]them.
[7:06]And in the book, it's very practical.
[7:08]There's a series of questions that you can ask yourself so that you can begin igniting
[7:14]those wants.
[7:16]And through those wants, we can then create some sort of a plan to begin doing them.
[7:23]And success is rarely an accident.
[7:25]I'm here today because of a lot of hard work and a discipline of positive direction
[7:30]that I documented created and now share.
[7:33]Well, just like going up through your life story here.
[7:37]So you talk about how you ended up in this sales job that was very lucrative.
[7:43]And you know, you had a nice life, you had the studio apartment in New York, you're feeling
[7:46]good.
[7:47]Sales for zerack, sales for pharmacy, clothes, whatever you were doing and how you felt.
[7:53]And you felt so much pressure to, yeah, zerack, zerack, zerack, zerack, that's it.
[7:58]You felt so much pressure to get married as so many of us, especially I feel like
[8:03]that not now in the same way, but I'm 45 and hitting 30, it was like, oh my gosh, who's
[8:08]around?
[8:09]It's like a game of musical chairs, like, okay, your music is ending, jump in what's
[8:14]an elbow.
[8:15]But you did describe this very, the chemistry you had with your ex and how even though
[8:20]you were warned, you were like, no, no, no, no, this is, no, which I also feel like
[8:25]is so relatable because we all know the guys who were not necessarily the best for us,
[8:30]but why are we so attracted to them, but especially at young ages.
[8:35]But then there you were divorced and like the power of even making that decision.
[8:39]And that's a really hard decision to make.
[8:41]So tell me a little more about that.
[8:43]The most difficult and it's exactly what you said back then 30 and single, especially
[8:50]for a big Italian family, I mean, I was feeling like a Spencer, my sister already had
[8:55]two kids, you know, Jennifer was having her kids, everyone was having kids.
[8:59]And I wasn't married.
[9:00]And thank goodness a lot has changed.
[9:02]I have three daughters, I have a boy and three girls.
[9:05]And I mean, my girls, you know, marriage, they're like, you know, after it all, after
[9:10]I become an artist, after I use it, do that.
[9:13]So I love how that dialogue has really has moved and I feel very much in positive direction.
[9:19]But that decision to go left, you know, to make a major change.
[9:26]It was arguably the most difficult decision of my life because, you know, he wasn't abusive.
[9:33]There wasn't, you know, there wasn't this, you have to leave.
[9:38]It was just this very, very strong feeling that we were not a good pairing.
[9:45]He did not want the same things that I wanted, this big family and, you know, rooted
[9:51]in tradition.
[9:54]And I just, I'm so grateful that I had the inside and the courage.
[10:00]to make that change.
[10:03]And I think that that was really a defining moment for me.
[10:07]I talk about living directionally in the book.
[10:10]It's the last life lesson and it's about living with vision.
[10:14]And this vision of what I wanted and what I had was so far apart
[10:21]that that was the motivation for the change.
[10:26]Yeah, my dad has the saying life's too short to be miserable.
[10:29]And so I always think about that.
[10:32]But these decisions are not easy to come by.
[10:35]And I don't know.
[10:36]Although it did make me want to ask you for a picture of your ex
[10:38]because I bet it was like, you know, pretty amazing.
[10:41]But anyway, I'm kidding.
[10:42]But then you go into your marriage and your love affair with
[10:48]Mark, your husband.
[10:49]And the way that he like inspired from day one,
[10:53]all this positive change in you, which is amazing.
[10:55]Right.
[10:56]From getting you to stop smoking.
[10:57]Maybe I'm like too much way.
[10:58]But I don't know.
[10:59]I just love you.
[11:00]And how you are willing to change.
[11:02]Like one of your hardest habits to kick because you realize
[11:06]it was just getting in the way of something so amazing.
[11:08]And all and raising your kids Jewish.
[11:10]You've been coming from a large Italian Catholic family.
[11:12]And your son's fire bits and all that.
[11:15]Like tell me about how you in a way.
[11:18]Like you you made that happen.
[11:20]You made it all happen.
[11:22]But it could easily not.
[11:23]I mean, I guess anything with life.
[11:24]You could say that.
[11:25]But I feel like this was so purposeful in how you had to make
[11:28]the decisions that got you to ultimately where you wanted to be.
[11:32]Which of course you're trying to teach everybody else.
[11:34]That's exactly right.
[11:36]I mean, you just something up perfectly.
[11:38]This was very conscious.
[11:40]You know, your ability to live the life you want is a very
[11:43]conscious decision.
[11:45]And once you can get clear on what that is,
[11:49]then you can actually say each and every day.
[11:52]Am I moving closer or further away.
[11:56]From what I want and what I see.
[11:58]Right.
[11:59]Then it really it sounds so simple.
[12:01]Once you learn these fundamentals of living directionally.
[12:06]It kind of is.
[12:07]So if you I want to be in this loving marriage.
[12:10]Well, how am I showing up today?
[12:12]Am I being loving or am I coming to the day with resentment and anger?
[12:17]Right.
[12:18]So once we can really get clear on what it is we want,
[12:21]we can then make those decisions.
[12:23]Mark for me, you know, was really.
[12:26]Taking advantage of this amazing opportunity.
[12:30]Mark is the smartest kindest.
[12:33]Most loyal and sincere.
[12:35]It has friends would be a mile long.
[12:37]I mean, mark is like that die.
[12:40]And I'm just so lucky that when I.
[12:43]met him at actually a second time,
[12:46]because we knew each other in a previous life.
[12:49]That I was ready to, you know, really go there with him.
[12:53]And I do think that everything happens for a reason.
[12:57]And I believe that we make things happen when we're ready for that.
[13:01]Very true.
[13:02]Wow.
[13:03]I love it.
[13:04]And now you also work with him on the rest in the restaurant world as well.
[13:08]And you do all this coaching.
[13:09]You're running back and forth to the restaurant.
[13:11]You have clients.
[13:12]You're dropping off the kids.
[13:13]Is that basically what life looks like for you?
[13:15]Yeah.
[13:16]And I'm sure you too.
[13:17]Right.
[13:18]I mean, how many hats do most of us?
[13:19]I don't have a restaurant.
[13:20]You know.
[13:21]Well, I mean, that wouldn't be a bad idea.
[13:25]I'm laughing now, but it has not been, you know, easy these last few years.
[13:32]It's been incredibly challenging during COVID.
[13:34]And a world of thanks to Mark and our teams for hanging in there and staying
[13:40]with it.
[13:41]So when I finally started dating, you know, Mark and getting serious.
[13:45]He was at that pivot where I think a lot of people are finding themselves right now.
[13:50]He had just moved back from London after deciding to move out of his, you know, last business overseas.
[13:58]And he was going to grad school.
[14:01]He was a Columbia getting his MBA.
[14:04]And he came to me like with this big idea of of opening this flagship barbecue restaurant, Texas inspired by his mom and dad who met at UT.
[14:14]And I say if it had come to me at any other time in my life, I probably would have looked at my boyfriend and said, are you crazy?
[14:23]But I was me deep in my coaching and really living this idea of, you know, whatever it is that you envision you can do.
[14:33]So I sort of jumped on board with him and we've spent the last 15 years building this, this brand and this flagship on 26th street.
[14:43]And yes, so much of our life has been running back and forth between the restaurant.
[14:48]Fortunately now it's sort of a bit of an institution where we've got our partners and our teams.
[14:54]And I think our guests know what to expect from from it, but it a lot of hard work.
[15:01]And I've got to just, you know, give my husband all the credit because that has really been his baby.
[15:07]While I've been raising our four and I'm just glad that I was able to be a part of it with with him and the team and I love our hill country family.
[15:18]And is it has it stayed open like did you have to do outdoor dining and all of that. Yes.
[15:23]We, our New York flagship has remained open the entire time on, you know, on delivery and outdoor dining. And now we're back to booking events and music and really starting up again, which is great.
[15:34]So where is it? I have to come to this restaurant.
[15:37]30 West 26th street between 6th and Broadway.
[15:42]Okay. Perfect. Amazing. Okay. I'm going to come. I mean, I'm sure most people have already been, but, you know, I found I haven't been.
[15:50]I don't know. I've since COVID. I've been very reluctant to basically leave my house at all times for basically any time.
[15:57]I think so.
[15:58]I think so many people have been and the great thing about New York is as many people have been there whenever I meet someone who has it.
[16:04]I'm like, right.
[16:05]More people discover. I mean, that's like a, that's why we lived here because it never, you know, it never gets old.
[16:12]It'll be fun to do an event there. I'm trying to plan a bunch of events coming up.
[16:16]It's not fun. Okay. Oh, well, we can circle back.
[16:19]It's okay. I hate that expression. I don't even know why I said that. Anyway.
[16:22]Okay. So I have to say when I got to the part in the book where you ran the half marathon, I was like, well, maybe I'm starting to hate her a little bit.
[16:28]Like now she's just like now I'm just like feeling really, you know, completely out of shape and like what can this woman not do?
[16:36]You know, like you're doing all the things and like running your business and mastering your body and like, you know, it's really amazing.
[16:44]You know, what you're talking about, how your physical life and your exercise because you talk about how important it is and how much you get out of it, not the, not just not the vanity, the, the emotion from it. So tell me about that.
[16:58]I think that for me and we all know what that is. For some people, it's a good book. Right. Like we draw energy from that. For some people, it's a vacation or time alone.
[17:08]For me, it's always been very physical. So I, you know, I was an athlete growing up and I just loved that feeling of the game and the score and the win and competing.
[17:19]So that has always fused me, fueled me. So how do we find that, you know, later in life through movement. And to your point, Debbie, I'm so I really I do this on Instagram all the time because if I make it look easy, I apologize.
[17:35]Absolutely exhausting. I have my days where I crash and I spend the whole day in bed. On Sunday, I said to the kids in my husband, pretend I'm not here.
[17:45]Because I'm not a good traveler and I don't like to go away and I look at, you know, women on girls trips and retreats and I think that's so amazing because that's for me a real area of grow. That's not something that I gravitate towards.
[17:59]So I actually have to like just let everyone know to pretend I'm not here so I can have a day to refuel myself because it's so much it's so much work.
[18:11]And if it's important to you, you make time for it. So the physical is really important to me. I lock it in my calendar at the beginning of the day.
[18:20]I did my squats and my setups before I jumped on the phone with you, even if it's just 40 squats, I mean, something to get my heart rate off and to feel like I move my body in a meaningful and purposeful way.
[18:33]That's important to me. And I think it's important to a lot of people.
[18:38]Last thing I said, I'm like jumping through your life. There was so much stuff to discuss. I really we can have episodes on like each little area.
[18:45]But you talk about dyslexia and how you need to help even with this book and tell that's affected your life. And here you are an author. So tell me about about the impact of that.
[18:56]I highlighted that because I wanted to inspire anyone who had something to say or to tell to please ask for help. I write about help in my book.
[19:07]For do it works because help is a sign of strength. Knowing where to go to get support is only going to make you better.
[19:19]And I have always gravitated towards getting help and I recognize how much that has assisted me in every area of my life.
[19:32]So I had a really hard time in school because I just I recognize no, I knew I was I knew I was smart. I was always very capable. I was, you know, a leader.
[19:42]And at the same time, things were not sticking, you know, in terms of, you know, when I would read I'd it would go in one brain and not the other I'd have to use a piece of paper to sort of line, you know, the reading.
[19:55]I went to public school and I went to a big public school and I was never flat.
[20:00]probably in the way I would have been now and in the way that my daughter was very early on.
[20:06]So I'm sure that I had some sort of, you know, learning challenge, mild to moderate dyslexia.
[20:13]My husband will tell you I write everything backwards. I mean one of our funniest stories where
[20:18]we were going traveling early in our relationship and he was asking me to look for, you know,
[20:23]root 69 and I took us all the way to root 96 which was like two hours in the opposite direction.
[20:30]So I, you know, I recognize these things that not come easily to me and I wanted to share this
[20:36]information and I got help. I got someone to help me write this material and I use technology.
[20:44]So I say help is often just a phone away. I use dictation devices to get a lot of these ideas
[20:51]on paper and now the, the tools that we have, I just downloaded a dictation reading device to help
[20:57]me get through, you know, books and articles a little bit quicker. So if there's something that's
[21:02]preventing you from getting to where you want to go, whether it's personally or professionally,
[21:08]look around to your community, to your network, to your friends, family, colleagues and see who can
[21:14]help. That's how you'll move forward. Love it. I'm going to put that on my do list.
[21:20]I'm going to look into what is it? What is it called? It's really neat. What's that? What's
[21:25]do you know what the app is called? The dictation thing? Oh gosh. I'm going to have to tell you
[21:31]send it to me. Just popped up. Okay. It's very cool. Okay. So in terms of your coaching business,
[21:36]let's say someone's listening to this and they're like, oh my gosh, can this woman please help me.
[21:40]I need her help. What should they do? And who are the best people? Like who are people who you're
[21:46]like? This is my sweet spot. I would love to help this type of person. I'm your girl.
[21:51]Okay. So the first thing I want to say is when we're working with coaches, I always,
[21:55]you know, I play a lot with with word choices. And I think when we're talking about coaching,
[22:00]we're saying, you know, I want a coach. I want you to be sort of motivated because
[22:06]really having a coach is such a it's such a it's such a luxury and they make you better.
[22:12]And at the same time, it's not everyone can, you know, have that. So the first thing is,
[22:17]it's you in the book. If it's not right, go left. There are coaching exercises with each chapter
[22:24]and you will feel like you've got me on your shoulder after you read a chapter and work yourself
[22:29]through those questions. So a lot of coaching is the art of asking questions. So you can get that
[22:35]just by being with the book and sort of being your own wellness coach. So that's the first thing
[22:41]thing I want to offer to people really do some of the work with yourself and get started.
[22:48]Then if you want to go deeper, you can go to my website, christenglosserman.com and ask for a 30 minute
[22:56]consult and that is something that I offer to anyone who wants to learn more about coaching and
[23:02]more about my practice. So that is available. And then you can look on the website further to see
[23:09]different packages or different offerings. So I do a one off call the hash out. That's a quick
[23:15]eat 45 minutes. You know, you've got a big meeting tomorrow. I really partnered with people in
[23:20]their businesses through my executive coaching practice. So a colleague of mine was flying to
[23:26]close around a funding and she's like, you know what? I just want to hash this out with you about
[23:30]how I'm going to show up the questions. I'm going to ask what I'm going to do, what I'm going to
[23:33]not do. I just want to get really clear on my meeting will do a hash out. Then I have other
[23:39]clients that I've been working with for two years. And I feel like I'm part of their, you know,
[23:44]lives and their businesses. And we meet once a month for, you know, we've been doing that for over a
[23:49]year now. And I'm really working with this young individual to craft her vision for her life
[23:56]and her business. So there are different ways that I work with people. If you are a person that wants
[24:02]to create positive change and you're really committed to it, then I think it's worth exploring
[24:08]with me or anyone else that's available. So how do people know if they need a coach or a therapist?
[24:14]That's a great question. I'm glad we can highlight that. So coaches, executive coaches, life coaches
[24:19]work with, you know, healthy, high functioning individuals. So we are practitioners of positive
[24:28]direction, life choices, decision. I'm a goal setting strategist. So I work around mindset,
[24:34]discipline, goal setting and accountability. That is different than someone who feels they are
[24:40]or may be clinically depressed. That is a different path. So I think understanding that is really important.
[24:50]Okay. And now that you've gone through the book process, how did you like, what is the short version
[24:56]of how you went from the idea to getting it published? As you know, you get it all on paper,
[25:02]you get your outline, you have a rough manuscript, right? And you begin shopping it out. You begin
[25:09]talking about what you've created to people. So one of the things I talk about in the book is
[25:15]not re-creating the wheel. If you're doing something, there's probably someone out there that's
[25:21]done something similar. Ask for help. So I went to my good friend, Margaret Zakorian, who is an author
[25:29]and has done books. And I said to her, okay, I have this manuscript. What do I do with it? And she said,
[25:35]I have a few people you can call and talk about it. So I made those calls. She gave me
[25:40]her publisher's name, who so politely and graciously passed on the book. And I said, okay,
[25:48]what other doors can I open? And I wound up going with an amazing partnership publisher in San
[25:54]Francisco, the collective book studio. And we just hit it off. And we started brainstorming
[26:01]about not only what was written, but what could be added, this whole idea of adding my personal
[26:05]story that came through collaboration. And I think once you give energy to any project, you know,
[26:13]it sort of takes out a life of its own. And over the course of two years, we came up with
[26:19]if it's not right go left. And it's really a, it's a self, it's my self help manual. And I'm
[26:25]offering and sharing. Well, but the photography is amazing. Who's your photographer?
[26:30]I had two great, if we have time for this quick story. So, so, you know, we were working on this
[26:37]book pre COVID. And Liza Gersman was my photographer. She's very, very talented. I tagged her
[26:45]a bunch on my IG. And she was flying into do the project. And we had mapped out that it would
[26:52]probably take four days of photography because I wanted to try to capture Manhattan. And then I grew
[26:59]up on Long Island. I consider myself very much a Long Island girl. So I wanted to capture some of
[27:04]that as well. What part of my life? So we're on Long Island. I was, I was raised in Dick Fills,
[27:10]is it 50? And we spent summers driving back and forth to Montauk. So you'll see, you know,
[27:16]I talk about the East End and the incredible effect that that area has had on me and my life and my
[27:23]family. Finding your happy place is such a important, you know, box to check. So if you haven't
[27:30]found it yet, keep looking, because that's where I know, you know, when things are getting rough,
[27:36]I know exactly where it go. So anyway, so Liza flies in and we do the first day. But the climate
[27:42]in New York is really concerning. People are starting to talk about this virus and what's happening
[27:48]overseas. And I'm getting texts from I have this wonderful woman in Italy who found me and I have this
[27:56]beautiful virtual relationship with. And she was telling me how bad things were getting over there.
[28:02]The voice of concern was like, I mean, I didn't know if she was being alarmist because she was
[28:08]trying to warn me on what was coming. And it just seemed so extreme from where we were in that
[28:14]actual moment. This is going back to March. And day two of the photo shoot, my makeup artist
[28:21]canceled. And Liza was, you know, I don't know if I can get there. I think I should book flight
[28:26]home. And I got an email from my neighbor in the building that she was pulling her kids at a school
[28:31]and leaving to New Jersey. I mean, literally in 24 hours, it felt like the whole city. Do you remember
[28:39]that moment? Yeah, it felt like that. That was the second day of our shoot. It was like you felt the
[28:44]whole city closing. And we went out to the park. We took some morning pictures and Liza just shut
[28:52]down. She's like, I have to go. And I said, you know, you have to go. And I have to go get my kids.
[28:56]And it was just clear that it was over. No matter where we were and how important and all the time
[29:02]effort and energy we'd put into this project, it was over a day and a half into it. And I think
[29:08]at that point, right, we all went into survival mode. We had no idea what was going to happen over the
[29:12]next few weeks. And I guess part of me thought the project was, you know, dead or at least postponed
[29:22]to an like we just had no idea. And then my publisher said, you know, do you want to just go with
[29:28]what we have? And this is where, you know, this is where my grit come like, no, no, like it's not
[29:37]even half like done. Like I haven't gotten this far to, you know, turn around halfway up the mountain.
[29:44]So I just said, let's, you know, let's sit on it. I'll use this time to edit, which was a beautiful
[29:50]thing because I had something productive to, you know, to work on during a really, really rough
[29:56]time. And then we, you know, we sort of, okay.
[30:00]up again when it when it felt right, we went out the bringing in a second photographer from the
[30:04]East End and Madison and you know somehow got it finished. So I hope the book is a is not only
[30:14]helpful but it really it's it's just such a message of resilience and determination that you
[30:23]just keep going even if the steps are really small you just keep going. Wow. Well thank you
[30:29]for sharing all that. I really got so much out of your story of your book of your lessons. I mean I
[30:35]literally am like reading this after I'm like you know saying like I shouldn't ask for help for
[30:40]this stupid back thing. So I'm like okay okay sometimes you have to like go through it to to
[30:45]internalize it. Right just like you were saying with COVID. It's like I had people warning me too
[30:49]in it. They were like don't let anyone in your house. It's like what are you talking about? We're
[30:52]having like having a book of in five minutes. So anyway. Well that's but that's a good news. I actually
[30:56]think you have to go through it to learn from it. Right. So if you're going through it now
[31:02]know that there's a there's the lesson in that and there's the strength in that and you're just
[31:08]you're just not through it yet but you will be able to draw from it. Wow. Well one day we should
[31:15]meet up in New York and get all four of our kids together and see what happens. It would be
[31:21]okay. Right. Let's just like throw somewhere. Okay. How old are the kids at least? Seven, eight,
[31:27]and 14, and almost 15, and almost nine, and seven. How about you? You lose track right? You like
[31:34]yes. Yesterday I think I got one of the ages wrong but don't tell anybody anyway. Yeah. An age or a birthday.
[31:39]Yeah. That's not my birthday. Nine, 11, 13, 14. Awesome. Yeah. All right. Well goals.
[31:52]All right. Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you for having me.
[31:55]Thank you for having me. I hope it helps. Yes. No. Feel well.
[31:59]And thank you also for bringing Michael into our lives. When I read this to my son last night
[32:04]as I was, it said in loving memory of my brother Michael John. I miss you and think about you
[32:08]every day and I'll hold you in my heart always. And I said to my son I was like and now we're
[32:12]holding him in our hearts. Like that's just the power of having this picture and the message and like
[32:17]that these strangers that I didn't even know, you know, no, not the two. No, we went to bed like
[32:22]thinking about your brother. So anyway. Thank you. Thank you so much. All right. Thanks a lot. Bye bye.
[32:30]Bye bye, David. Thanks for listening to this episode of Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books.
[32:35]Don't forget to follow me on Instagram at zebi Owens and at Moms Don't Have Time to Read Books.
[32:40]Also sign up for my newsletter at zebiowens.com and sign up for my virtual book club and meet lots
[32:45]of authors on zoom every other week. Thanks so much to Steve and Ryan at Textures Sound for
[32:50]The Sound Editing. And thank you to Morning Moon Productions for providing this fantastic intro and
[32:55]now trim music.